Changing shoes

I found my little red Duffs in a big store in the biggest mall in Minneapolis. I fell in love with them. And they were cheap! I was so proud of them, and I made sure everyone at work got to drool over them. I was so infatuated by these little red runners that my co-worker and I declared "Red Shoe Day" and invited everyone to come in the next day with red shoeware to celebrate.

I bought them the same weekend I went to see Sigur Ros live in concert at the Orpheum Theatre. I don't know what it is that makes my red shoes so magical, but it's not just their colour. I think it's because that weekend centered around the best music I had ever seen live, and anything attached to that experience, red duffs included, turned into something magical and extravagant. My senses were alive, and so were these shoes.

This was over a year ago. Since then, my poor shoes weathered an unfortunate run with a wet paintball field. No less than 2 months after they were pulled out from the crisp tissue paper folds of the box, I wore them on a tv shoot for work - at a paintball place. I didn't think ahead of time. I came home with paint stains in all primary colours all over their red coat. I scrubbed them madly. The result? A faded red coat. Not pink... but it definitely lost its original radiance.

Nevertheless, I could not disown my little red shoes - which had become my pride and joy, the topic of many conversations and the object of an office-wide holiday.

My shoes lost its rich red coat almost on day one. But I have worn them through, even until today. They now have a few tiny holes shredded through on the sides and they have morphed and stretched into uneven shapes. But they're still my little red shoes.

I weathered a big month this August. It's getting rougher by the day, but it's really Change I'm feeling right now. I've seen two of my closest friends move away, I'm approaching my last day at my favourite place of work, and I'm gearing up for a year of scholastic unknowns. I'm learning to take the time to mourn the departure of friends, and the departure of a good phase in life. I'm recognizing that Change highlights the value of the past and confirms that there is something worth missing. Its worth is emphasized in the extent of the sadness. Change is only good when it's sad, yet hopeful of the unknowns.

The state of my red shoes is sad. But it's only sad because I know what they used to look like and when I wear them, I remember that glorious walk as I left the Orpheum Theatre. I just look at my feet and I can't help but smile, though I know that one day soon I'll find a newer, more exciting pair of shoes.

I think I see green in my future.